A Conversation

It happened last week and went something like this:

"How come the So-And-Sos don't come to church here any more?"

"He was asked to step down from teaching his Sunday School class because he was teaching 'Baptist things.'"

"'Baptist things?' What's that?"

"I'm not sure, but he was teaching it and the Elders didn't like it."

"Why didn't they like it?"

"Because we're Christian, not Baptist."

"But I thought Baptists WERE Christians."

"Well, they are, but they teach different things than Christians."

"Like what?"

"You know. 'Baptist things.'"

"You already said that. What specifically was he teaching--the 'Baptist things'--they didn't like?"

"I really don't know."

"Who told you that?"

"People."

"Which people?"

"I really don't remember."

"So, people you don't remember told you things about someone that you really don't know what they meant...and you're repeating it?"

"Yea. Didn't you hear what I said?! He was teaching 'BAPTIST THINGS!' We're not Baptist."

"What are the differences in what we teach versus what they teach?"

"I'm not sure. I just know that we teach the Bible."

"Don't the Baptists teach the Bible?"

"Well, yes. I guess so. Are you trying to confuse me?"

"No. I'm just trying to understand...trying to find out why the So-And-Sos don't come to our church any more."

"[Sigh] I already told you! He believes in 'Baptist things!"

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Stinkin' Baptists.